Phantom Flyer

Although, I don't think the article appropriately captured the kind of
Wild Men who flew Phantoms. Street fighters...guys (and guys only) who:

- Farted at the duty desk with contempt and pride
- Wiped their nose on their sleeve
- Smoked in the briefing rooms-smoked in the cockpit
- Had true rivalries between sister squadrons but stood united against
outside factions
- Threw up on their party suits and didn't wash them for at least 3 more
"Ville Runs"
- Were "on time" or "above the zone" to rank
- Rarely were selected to PME in residence
- Never came back to the pattern with bombs
- Fired the gun all the time
- Tried at least one unsanctioned maneuver that nearly caused them to
eject
- At one time in their career understood "Gleaves Resolution"
-Never understood the concept of air conditioning in the cockpit
- Had BOLDFACE EP's
- Had the opportunity to excel at marriage at least twice
- Had an eyepatch in their "special weapons" kit
- Were Pulitzer Prize winning authors in the doofer book
- Were reknowned for world-class porn libraries in mobile
- Used the "f-word" in every grammatical capacity (noun, verb,adjective,
gerund...etc)....a lot
- Stayed in "condemned" dorms at Kunsan
- Thought wan was monopoly money and spent it accordingly
- Flew by color (green, red, yellow), aural tone, and gauge needle
position--not by "wire"
- Proudly displayed "Rhino bites" as rites of passage
- Understood and practiced altitude, airspeed, and dive angle on the
range-or paid in the debrief
- Spent an entire sortie troubleshooting a problem only to discover on
initial a popped circuit breaker
- F---ed up a GBU-15 drop
- Were always concerned about fuel
- Had at least a few "no shit" bizarre people in their squadron
- Always tried to boink the med tech while TDY-no matter what she looked like
- Understood sock checks, combat crud games, deceased insect drills, and choir practice to be mandatory formations
- Never had a squadron bar bigger than an average shitter
- Had some scar tissue from sqd bar dart games
- Had squadron cc's/opso's with at least 1,500 hours and dirt under
their fingernails-minimal "touch and go" square fillers
-Had meaningful and emotional naming parties
- Always strived to make "incentives" puke or shit their pants
- "Zapped" anything that didn't move-urinals, mirrors, gear doors...etc
- Won Turkey Shoots with time, distance, heading and great bombing
technique-not computers
- Always have the best stories-even if the "facts" change a little each
time

You know what I mean?  

Phantoms Phorever!